The One Thing That Must Be Right Before a Single Child Walks In

If you are dreaming of young families filling your church, I want to walk beside you on something we sometimes hurry past in our eagerness to grow. Before you launch a nursery, a kids' hour, or a youth night, there is a foundation that has to be poured first. Not a fun theme. Not a curriculum. A safety floor.

Here is the tension so many of us feel in a small church. Our volunteer bench is thin. We are tempted to leave one trusted adult in a room, or to skip a background check just to fill a slot, or to lean on the comforting thought that "we all know each other here." I understand that pressure completely. But that gap, the one small churches are most likely to have, is exactly the gap abusers look for. Nothing matters more than child safety. A single incident can devastate a child and unravel a church.

This is not a program you add. It is infrastructure you build first.

A quick and important word

What follows is not legal advice. Background-check requirements, mandatory-reporting duties, and volunteer ratios vary by state, denomination, and insurer. Every church needs its written policy reviewed by its insurance carrier and a local attorney, and must follow denominational standards and state law. Wherever I mention a specific number below, treat it as a starting point to verify locally, not a rule to rely on blindly.

Why this is a gate, not an upgrade

There is a hard financial reality most pastors do not learn until they ask. Insurers typically require child-protection policies (background checks, the two-adult rule, and more) as a condition of your abuse-liability coverage. In plain terms, a church often cannot be properly insured to run a kids' ministry until this baseline already exists. So this is not the polish you add at 50 or 75 members. It is the prerequisite you meet before you welcome the first family. If you are building toward the milestones on our milestones path, put this in place before the growth arrives, not after.

The non-negotiable frameworks

Here is the protective minimum, in plain language.

The two-adult rule. Never leave a child alone with a single adult. Two screened adults in every room, at all times, no one-on-one meetings behind closed doors. This protects children, and it protects your volunteers from false accusations. It applies to everyone, including the pastor. No exceptions.

Screening for all. Everyone who works with children gets screened first: regular volunteers, occasional helpers, staff, and the pastor. Collect a signed application and authorization, run the checks, and review the results before anyone serves.

Secure check-in and check-out. Parent and child receive matching identifiers (a number or code). The child is released only to someone with the matching tag. Authorized pickup only.

Line of sight. Windows or half-doors so every room is visible. Secure exits so children cannot wander out. Visibility itself is a prevention layer.

Ratios that never drop below two. Staff each room to the age group, and never fall below two adults regardless of how few children show up.

Illness and restroom rules. Keep clearly sick children home with posted criteria. For restroom trips, either two adults go along or one adult keeps the door open with another nearby. Never one adult alone with a child in a restroom.

Mandatory reporting. In most states, anyone working with children is legally required to report suspected abuse. Reporting is required, not optional. Do not investigate in-house. Report to CPS or police, document, and involve leadership. Confirm your state's exact duty.

A written policy with signed acknowledgments. All of the above in writing, with each volunteer signing that they have read and understood it, kept on file.

The baseline numbers to build around

Use these as your starting benchmarks and verify them with your insurer, attorney, and state.

Adults per room: minimum two screened adults, always, no matter the child count.

Background check: national criminal database, sex-offender registry, and SSN trace at minimum.

Cost: roughly $10 to $25 per check. Budget for it.

Re-check cadence: every two to three years.

Infants (0 to 12 months): about one adult per two or three infants, never below two adults.

Toddlers (12 to 24 months): about one adult per three or four toddlers, never below two adults.

Auto-disqualifiers: any conviction or pending charge for child abuse, neglect, or sexual offenses.

Keep-home window: no fever, vomiting, or diarrhea within the last 24 hours.

Digital check-in: roughly $20 to $100 a month as you grow.

The order of operations

Stand the safety protocols up before the doors open.

Screen everyone first, and re-check every two to three years.

Enforce the two-adult rule with no exceptions, the pastor included.

Run secure check-in and check-out, capturing allergy and emergency-contact info. Start on paper, move to digital as you grow.

Make rooms visible with windows or half-doors and secure exits.

Post and enforce your illness and restroom rules, and empower volunteers to graciously decline a clearly sick child.

Train every volunteer as a mandatory reporter: the warning signs, who to tell, and that reporting goes to CPS or police, not in-house.

Write it all into one policy and collect signed acknowledgments.

Have it reviewed by your insurer and a local attorney, aligned to your denomination and state.

Drill the emergencies: fire, medical, missing child, and lockdown. Do not just hand your team a document.

What to do next

Don't let the length of this list discourage you. You are not building a bureaucracy. You are building a place where a parent can drop off their child and trust you completely. Start with the two-adult rule and screening, because those are the two the enemy exploits most and the two your insurer will ask about first. Everything else can be layered in over the following weeks. If you want help assessing where your church stands right now, our assessment can show you the gaps before they cost you.

Your challenge this week

Write down every adult who currently serves or helps with children in any way, and put a checkmark next to each one who has completed a background check. Anyone without a check does not serve again until it is done. That single list is where your safety floor begins.